the best decision

ph: boa noite cinderela

He was dangerous to me. They told me my health would be affected. He was bad. He was a user. But it just felt right.

He was my best friend. He helped me when I had a guy issue that was making me cry myself to sleep at night. He was dating someone else at the time and I never tried anything. He was the kind of guy every girl kind of sort of has a crush on because he’s cute and sweet and funny. The girl he was with broke his heart. I helped him through his heart broken love songs and he vented to me about how much he still felt like he needed her.

I confessed that I liked him. He kissed me after a day trip to visit my friend in the hospital. Our relationship began. It was just immature and silly. We fought and then broke up over sex. I told him I wanted to wait until marriage. He didn’t get it. I realized he was using me as a rebound. I couldn’t take it.

A few weeks later he started dating some girl that we both hated. He told me we could still be friends and he didn’t want to lose me. I was okay but I cried every time I saw them together. Every Sunday I had to go straight home instead of his house and I cried every time. I hated myself for losing him and I hated him for being such a jerk.

The evil girl broke up with him and he came crawling back to me. I hated him for that. I felt like a rebound again. I told him to fuck off and get a life. He still tried. He invited me over his house and I accepted even though I knew what would happen. We watched movie in his room and then he started talking and coming closer to my face. I kept turning my head away. We both knew what we were doing. He got like an inch from my face and then just stayed there. I rolled my eyes and then pulled him in to kiss him. It was the most magical thing I’ve ever experienced.

He told me he would change and that he was sorry for the past. I didn’t really believe him and I distrusted him a lot. But then we started dating again. Everyone told me I was stupid for falling for his tricks. But something just told me that he had changed and that this was a good move. A year and few a months later, I still believe it was the best decision I’ve ever made. Don’t always do what other people tell you to; do what your heart says. But don’t be stupid about it. Love comes at times and through people we would never picture ourselves with sometimes. You just have to be patient. And trust yourself. You may just surprise yourself.

love, E

a heart that will love you

ph: weheartit

when you least expect them and need them most

ph: stolen inspiration

I didn't even notice him at first. Well that's a lie, he is hard not to notice. I recognized how beautiful he was and appreciated it but left it at that. There was so much going on with me, I was still haunted by someone that had shattered me to the core. And then there was getting adjusted to a whole new city, a foreign one at that. I had no time for anyone else but my broken self, and I was more than okay with that.

Time heals all wounds, or so they say. And I was picking up all my broken pieces and happy again, for the first time in a year I could breathe easy. Being away, out of reach and six hours ahead changed my perspective. I had time to finally fix myself without being hounded by harassing calls and messages.

And then it happened. Things like this you never see coming, people like him. I had no idea that first night all that he would come to mean. I wasn't looking for him at all, but there he was. Making eyes and flirting lead to dancing which lead to much much more. And he was mine, and I was his, at least for a time. And it was magical. Never before had something come so easy. It was simple and it was fun and it was perfect. Dancing and laughing for hours, falling into each others arms, whispering and playing and loving. No hurt or disappointment, nothing like before.

It was perfect, but it was fleeting. Time was up in my foreign city and it was back to reality. He will always be a happy memory. The endless potential of all that we were and all that we could have been will always make my heart ache in the best and worst of ways. More than anything though he showed me that things happen to you when you least expect them and need them most. Without knowing he helped me fix my broken pieces.

as we said good bye

ph: zewlean + weheartit

a girl and a guy

ph: weheartit

I have a boy friend. He's one of my best friends in the world, and if I ever lost him, a part of me would be lost too.

He's never been my 'boyfriend'. But he's seen me through a few boyfriends over the past half a decade. He's always been there.

People think it's strange that we've never gotten together, but somehow, it's perfect.

The first time I realised just how much I loved him was when a girl broke his heart.
I wanted to shout at her, tell her what a loss it was to give him up. That's when I realised I loved him.

I love him for who he is, whatever mistakes he's made, no matter how terrible, even when he's being a jerk. I love the person he was when we first met, and the person he's now become. I don't think I know how to stop loving him.

But if you think this is a fairytale story of friends falling in love, you would be utterly wrong. I'm not in love with him, he's not in love with me. And we both know that. And you know what? It's completely ok.

I'm sharing this because I believe a girl and a guy can be best friends and not need to fall in love. Because there are so many friendships out there that have been spoilt by unrequited feelings, simply because one person feels that they have to fall for the person because they're that close.

He told me that it's possible to find people out there whom are willing to take away your loneliness without having to be in a relationship with them. He is one of them to me. And this is a thank you, because recently I realised just how much he loves me back.

So here's to the guys who get teased for being friend-zoned, but continue to love the girls in their lives anyway.

the most "you"

ph: weheartit

karma

ph: Ingrid Voldmo

I feel the need to write coz i'm in the darkest hour of my life, and no matter how much i talk to my friends theres still something i can never share with them.

I had heard about heartbreak, but never really realised it until now how painful that is. My heart is broken in way i never know that it can heal back. I loved a guy, i was 19 when i met him, and i knew instantly that i was gonna spend my life with him, he said the same. He made sure i knew if it wasnt me there wont be anyone else. I did everything i could to be with him. We were gonna get married, our parents had agreed and i was just waiting for him to be ready. We were not compatible, but we wanted to be with each other, almost 5 years.....we would have completed 5 years together tomorrow, if only we were together.

But he turned out to be a guy i never imagined he would be, i thought i could judge a person but he had me totally fooled. 2 months back he started ignoring me, never called and i thought maybe he's busy, if only i knew what or whom he was busy with. We didnt talk for a month, and when we spoke he told me he was over me and had moved one, i still couldnt believe it. I thought it was just another fight, but when i came to know he had moved on with someone else, i still couldn't believe. Coz i didn want to believe it, but he accepted it....he was lying to me for months, pretending to be just her friend. She pretended to be my friend, she spoke to me and advised me that i should not be with him, but i didn know what a whore she was. Home wrecker, she knew our parents had met and we wanted to get maried, i shared my problems with her and she used to lure him. And it worked. Even before i could accept the reality that we weren't together anymore he told me they were getting married. Yesterday they got engaged....

The only thing i was most scared of happened to me. I was cheated. My heart broke into millions of pieces and the worst part is i still cant get over it. I have to make a brave face in front of everyone, coz i dont want them to know that it has affected me, and i'm strong. But the truth is i have thought about him every single day of my life since i'v known him, since the day he told me he has moved on, and i dont know when will it stop. Every time i close my eyes his face flashes in front of me, the memories..... they just kill me every time i think of them.. I wish there was a cure for heartbreak, coz it breaks every time i hear any news about him, or see his picture with her, my breaks all over again. If only i knew when it would finally stop hurting.

I'm not a bad person but i can never wish happiness to him, i want him to suffer, i want him to hurt and go through what i have gone through, coz i didn't deserve what he did to me. I was faithful, loyal and totally committed to him, but he just pretended to be committed, lied and cheated. And i want him to suffer, burn in hell. I hope he's never trully happy in life. I hope she is never truly happy in life.

I believe in karma, and i hope they get what they deserve. I just hope these memories fade soon, coz i'm losing my strength........